Being a Shill: The Conundrum

After putting this off for about two months, I decided to email a socialite about how to start my media empire. Her suggestion? Work at a media startup for a year, then create a side gig, and then transition into full time. The idea is to learn by doing.

Fair enough. Now I have a more focused, targeted plan, rather than being scatterbrained and hoping for the best. I had initially been posting on Craigslist and Monster, hoping for something. Anything!

So now I know how to revise my things.

For the past month or so, after posting my resume on the internet, I have been getting plenty of job offers. But I’m not thrilled. Why? Because the bulk of them are either from insurance companies, multilevel marketing schemes, or they just don’t know how to follow directions!

Here was my week last week:

On Sunday, a woman called me around 7 pm, telling me about a job “opportunity” (red flag – you should always be cautious when a potential employer keeps using the word “opportunity.” What that really means is it’s not really a job, which means they don’t really have to pay you). Another red flag is this: what legitimate company calls you on a weekend night for a job interview? She told me that the place was called Pappas Agency, and that I would be representing unions, such as carpenters, police, teachers, etc. I thought it sounded fantastic! She gave me the address, and we scheduled an interview. She told me to call her after the interview, to let her know how it went, since she wouldn’t be the one interviewing me (yet another red flag!). And, telling me that to go to the interview with an open-mind. Now, unless the interview is for somethiing explicitly sexual, there’s no need to tell me to go into an interview with an open mind. So we have four red flags right here.

After the phone call, I checked the address, both to see how I would get there and it’s location, and also to see if I could find out some more information about this company. This is what I found out:

  • The company name she gave me wasn’t “technically” the name of the company. She conveniently left out that it was an INSURANCE COMPANY! The fact that she left out that major detail made me know that I would never go on an interview.
  • There’s a huge difference between representing unions and being an insurance salesperson. Why couldn’t she say that?
  • There is a $299 fee that you have to pay to take some course. I don’t know too much about insurance, but I did have an interview with an insurance company (one that was upfront!) a few years ago, and I was never told that I would have to pay for a course. Legitimate companies usually will eat that cost.
  • Also…their own website says it’s like having your own business. UM….NO! JUST NO! I am so tired of these sales and marketing jobs lying to (mainly) young people, telling them they have their own business. You don’t. Because if you did, you’d be able to change the price of products as needed. If you can’t, you don’t own your own business. Simple!

Of course, when I didn’t show up for the interview, I received a phone call from “Alicia.” Twice. I blocked her. I really don’t like being lied to (and yes, I do consider being super vague about what the job actually entails until I get to the interview. I don’t feel like wasting time or money, y’know?

What’s interesting to me is that these sketchy jobs will constantly call you. Why call me multiple times a week? I have a feeling that a company like Google wouldn’t do such a thing. It’s a red flag to me, because that’s signifies a high turnover. And I have to ask, why the high turnover?

I’ve gotten two more calls from a Winmore Inc, and Jeffrey Charles, Inc. Of course, both are sketchy. Winmore wants me to go door-to-door, begging people to get them to lower their energy bills. I tried that a few years ago, and lasted all of a day. Nope! I have nothing against commish only jobs, but….nah…

Jeffrey Charles is worst! The reviews were atrocious, and of course, in their emails to me, they don’t tell me what exactly it is that I would be doing. Reading the reviews, I would have to attend 6 AM meetings, pound the pavement at 7:30, regroup at 7:30 PM, and then leave at 9 PM. So basically….I’d be working for 15 hours a day. And of course, there is no pay. OH, but wait! This job consists of going door-to-door, begging people to get mobile phone plans. Um….why on earth would I do that? So, taking public transportation, I’d only have enough time to sleep four 3-5 hours a day. No thank you.

I’m getting continually bombarded with jobs about insurance and marketing, when I’m not interested at all. I also got an offer about working outside of New York. I told them I’m not interested in working outside of New York, especially since I have no car (and probably won’t get one for a while). Dude pressed me, saying there’s a travelling component, with four to six months required. I’m like, DUDE CAN YOU READ?! I’m not interested in working outside of New York. Even New Jersey is stretching it.

I swear, people are silly.

Also, a red flag is….why on earth would shills fill up a complaint board? I don’t appreciate being called stupid or lazy. They contradict themselves, though. When you go to these meetings (which are really just hype, to endure the grueling, bone crushing no’s that you’ll be getting all day), they tell you that the work is easy. Even a toddler can do it! But when you fail (and you inevitably will), they jump on the Internet, and tell you you’re lazy for not putting in the hard work. What

Honestly, if I’m going to be working those kind of hours, I’d much rather be working for myself. Which is what I plan on doing.

PS – my rant is really less about insurance and more about the “sketchier” companies. I understand that there’s a possibility of shills coming to this blog and telling me that since I didn’t work there, I can’t say anything about the experience. No buddy. Once in often enough!

I am back.

Yes, after a month or so hiatus, I’ve returned. I will totes make an effort to be better. Though I keep promising that and failing.

Today is my birthday. I’ve hit the big 2-7. I do not feel radically different, as I’ve essentially been preparing myself for the past two weeks of turning 27. Yesterday, I had a near melt-down as the clock was ticking, kissing goodbye to my last day of ever being 26. Now I’m one year closer to 30. 30 just seems like it will be a swell year.

But that really just means I have to get my shit together before then. They say that 85% of your major life decisions you will make before you turn 35. Which means I have a lot of shit to do before I turn 35. No pressure, right? No pressure at all!

I would be lying if I didn’t say that I’m a bit disappointed that it is raining on my birthday. That really hasn’t happened since I was in middle school. And it’s supposed to rain all day. My boyfriend has some plans for me, but at the rate the rain is going, I might not get to do them *cries, cries harder*

He’s the best. When I turned 25, he took me to the Chocolate Room in Brooklyn, then I went to see my first professional basketball game, and I got to see the back and side profile of Jay-Z. After that, we went to Union Hall to participate in karaoke. I never actually got to go onstage because hours and some dude kept going up there doing awful renditions of 80s rock. Last year, I went to see Anchorman 2, ate pizza at an “authentic” Italian restaurant in Williamsburg, and saw a band at Brooklyn Night Bazaar. Good times.

But yeah…I’ll write more. I promise.