I recently came across an article on modern dating and the ugly truths of it. A lot of them were no-brainers and frustrating, like how people seem allergic to set plans, and they create these “maybe” plans that they’ll only go on if nothing “better” came along (I couldn’t date someone who did that, save for emergencies, obvy). And then the whole communicating through texting, which is horrifically impersonal. Yet I admit that I did that initially with my current beau: it took me a week until I actually talked to him on the phone. Texting was ok, because he could have been at work, or just didn’t want to answer (decisions, decisions!). And our first phone conversation was six hours or eight hours long. Whoa!
BUT….this was the one that caught my attention the most, and it was about karma. When things end ugly, some of us like to think that this person will get a huge dose of karma, and as quickly as possible. Well, sometimes, karma does come, but sometimes it doesn’t. Sometimes, these people will just live their lives, and you’ll be left feeling miserable as shit.
I’m wondering why we think like this. Maybe it’s a defense mechanism. Oh, you cheated on me, so one day, someone will cheat on you! Ha! Oh, our engagement fell apart, I hope you end up getting some chick pregnant or contract an STD ha! And I can’t help but wonder if part of our motivation to succeed and do better in life is in the hopes of running into said person again, life in shambles, while we’re on the top of the world. And see that look of despair in their eyes, the one that says, “Damn. The good one got away.” And maybe they’ll grovel at your feet, begging, pleading for you to come back. And you’ll just look them in the eye and tell them, “HELL NO.” And walk away, with your own 70s blaxploitation-style music playing in the background.
Oh, wouldn’t life be better that way?
I’m wondering if that’s why it’s even harder to let go of people. It’s something that a lot of people that I know suffer. It’s something I have suffered myself. I sometimes wonder, how does one know when you’ve let go of someone? What is the list?
But maybe….if you have to ask, then you probably aren’t.